Four Years

I can’t believe my sweet little angel baby is four years old!

Four seems like a big threshold.  This year Bea will be entering preschool (a milestone she CAN’T wait for, thanks to Big Sis), and suddenly there will be another adult added to the influences in her life.

Four is the age where my girls seem to come into their own with knowing what they want for presents.  MG asked for (and received) a palace pets castle at four (something Bea plays with all the time now).  Bea is asking for very specific presents this year with a Minnie mouse airplane at the top of her list.  She has also chosen her cake, chocolate with a Minnie mouse plastic garnish.  Yes, this is the year of the mouse for my little girl, but seeing as how fast those tastes change once school comes along, I am happy to indulge for now.

Three has been fun.  Her expression has exploded this year.  On her third birthday, she was stringing just a few words together at a time and spent a long time thinking before she would speak.  Now, her words can’t quite catch up to her brain as she often repeats a filler word “so, so, so, so…” while she attempts to get her thoughts out.

She has relished her time spent in “Bea school” this year and has been an excellent student.  She has learned to cut expertly, glue well, trace and recognize letters, and her coloring skills have improved.  Every single day she asks if we can do Beaschool as soon as I put Sib down for a morning nap.  I’ve also enjoyed my solo time with her as baby girl has been quite the distraction as of late, getting into and making messes when she’s awake.  It’s been nice to have the one on one time with my middle.

Some of her quirks include: she does not like to get her hands sticky/messy.  She will beg to wash them as soon as they touch any kind of food matter that leaves a residue (salt, grease, sugar, you name it). She will go the distance to eat a Rice Krispie treat, or a slice of banana bread with a spoon.  At the YMCA last week, they were having the kids paint their hands to make handprints on a sign and she outright refused, preferring instead to color and even then was peeved about the marker leaking onto her fingers.

Speaking of the YMCA, the ladies had mentioned that she seemed like an old soul.  Like she has an unshakeable confidence about her.  She is very sure of what she wants/doesn’t want, and never wavers. I think this is a very accurate description of our Bea.  I think come high school, she will be a force to be reckoned with because she will possess two compatible, but lethal traits: beauty and confidence.

She still loves her animal babies, the creepy ones with the big eyes and pacifiers.  She spends untold amounts of time every day changing their outfits and seeing to their comfort.  (she has two because she lost her prized one: Baby Bear, earlier this year.  While he was missing we replaced him with Baby Squirrel, and much to our surprise, Baby Bear resurfaced) One thing I find interesting about her is that she latches onto a toy for a day, usually something small like a shopkins or a piece of jewelry, like a ring.  She will carry this around all day in her hand.  Although I was hesitant at first, she begged to take these possessions with her into child watch and Sunday School.  She will take care of and remain close fisted around this possession the entire time.  She definitely seems to have some peculiarities about organization and her things.

Other than Baby Bear, her favorite toys are playsets (Minnie mouse camper, shopkins, dog park), and her purple watch.  She also seems to enjoy carrying around paper.  A folded notecard and especially the paper that comes inside the new toys (usually the one with instructions or the plastic ones that shows pictures of the toy in play).  Once again, she will carry the chosen thing around in her tight fist all day and grows concerned if it becomes improperly unfolded.

Bea is my first child that enjoys going out and seeing the world.  She never minds being dropped off for Sunday school or MOPS, and every day asks “so where are we going today?” She is the foil to her older sister, the homebody.  Every time we run an errand, even if it is to Costco or the bank, she says, “that was fun”.  She’s an easy one to entertain and always has been.

As sad as it is for me to watch my girls grow up, each birthday brings the potential for lots of new milestones and most importantly memories.  And that is something I will always look forward to.

Happy four years, Bitty Bea!  We love you so much!



Happy Birthday, Bea!!!


(picture credit: Kimmy Howard Photography)

Three years ago we were shocked and excited to meet you on your due date.  Now we are anticipating a new little family member to be joining us soon and bumping you up the ranks of Big Sister (secretly, I’m glad you didn’t get a little sister for your birthday ;))

This year we have seen some HUGE changes in you.  You were barely talking one year ago on your second birthday, and now you are speaking in sentences and adding new vocabulary every day.  As your communication has gotten better, so has your relationship with MG.  The two of you have become fast friends and you often go to her first for comfort (over Daddy or me).  She is very accommodating of you (most of the time) and is happy to act as a mother figure to you whenever you allow it.

You have also accomplished two other huge milestones: giving up your paci and potty training.  Both of these things you surprised me with how easy-going you were and remained for the duration.  I don’t know if I’ve ever met such a good-natured child as yourself and it’s something I thank God for often.

You love princesses (I’m not sure where this love was first sparked ;)), pajamas, books, singing, and imitating MG.  You would rather leave the house than stay home all day, and you’re a bit fickle with some foods but you will never turn down chocolate.

Beatrice means “bringer of joy”.  I love this name for many reasons but I was happy to incorporate it into our family because our family verse is “The Lord has done great things for us and we are filled with JOY”  Psalm 126:3   I’m happy to say you have lived up to this meaning in a very literal way.  You have brought so much joy to our family; both by your gentle presence but also by your intentional efforts to do so.  My mental image of you is one with shiny eyes and a big smile on your face, scanning the room to see if everyone has heard the joke you just told.

Year four will bring the beginning of knowledge (preschool/Bea school), transitioning away from naps, and seeing you blossom more into the roles God gave you in our family: daughter & sister (both little and big).

You have brought so much delight to my heart and I am happy to call you mine!




Here are some updates on the M girls:

MG has come to embrace school a little bit more as we roll into the new year.  Capitalizing on this enthusiasm, I tried to introduce the concept of Kindergarten next year.  She immediately balked at the idea of going to school every day?? and wondered who her teacher would be.

Her favorite pastime lately has been to cut.  She cuts like her father too, her mouth opening and closing in sync with each hand squeeze. She will often come find me about 45 minutes into naptime with a stack of looseleaf and an assortment of drawing utensils.  “Ok, I really need you to draw coronation Anna first,” and then she’ll pause a moment, gauging my reaction, “and then I need you to draw Elsa in her nightgown.”  Satisfied with my acquiescence, she hastily throws in, “and Tiana in her ballgown.  But THAT’s IT….for now”.

I draw the princesses for her, one per page; she sometimes adding comments about my skills or reminding me to add shoes, “high heels, please”.  Once, I got a little hasty with Rapunzel’s eyes and they were looking a bit Heaven-ward.  “Rapnuzel looks like she has crazy eyes!”, was her assessment.   When I didn’t acknowledge my failings, she said, “oh well, ‘we’ can just turn it over and draw Belle on the back instead.”

Somehow, she understands that she is obligating me during my precious alone time, but she also seems to understand that part of my reluctance is just for show.  We smile knowingly at each other during these exchanges.  She gets me, that one.

After I draw her requested princesses, she attempts to rope me into coloring them in.  She stands over my shoulder, breathes down my neck, “Use yellow here.”  “She doesn’t have brown hair, she has BLACK hair!”  Sometimes I can convince her to help me with the coloring part too, but not always. “It won’t take you very long.” she presses.

Next she will take these drawings into her little sanctuary of a room and cut them out.  She will cut quickly but carefully around the edges, making sure to preserve the small details like fingers and hair buns.

When I go up to her room later, I will find the floppy princesses scattered around in a delicate play.

When I was just a little bit older than her, I would draw and cut out pretend hamsters to play with because I wanted a pet one really badly.  I get her too.

Bea has always loved to draw and lately has been trying really hard to hold the pencil correctly.  It warms my heart to see her draw and eat with her left hand, a small homage to her aunt and granny.

She has been cutting her final molars and has been a bit sensitive lately as a result.  This is as close to moody as she ever seems to teeter.  It still takes very little to whip her into a flurry of smiles and excitement.  I love that about her.  Even on her worst days, she’s just a tickle away from contagious giggles.

Lately, she has wanted to take the reigns from us in dressing herself, pottying, chores, anything really.  “No, I do it.” she says.  I love and greatly encourage independence in my girls, except of course, when we are running behind and she insists on putting on her socks at the speed of the elderly with arthritis.  It’s amazing the parallels between the young and the old, no?

Unlike her big sister, I don’t think she’s too thrilled about our upcoming May excitement.  This is the reaction I get every time I ask her:


I’m sure she’ll come around in time…right, middle children of the world?

Speaking of Mayby2, I visited the doctor yesterday for my 5 month checkup.  It was a quick and easy appointment.  Once again, it took a little while to find the heartbeat, which is becoming a common theme with this one, but I could feel her moving during the search, so I wasn’t too worried.  Heartbeat sounded good at 151 and my stomach is no longer measuring a full week ahead, just a half week now.  This still lines up with my earlier due date prediction but not quite as much as I was hoping for.  Third children are notoriously unpredictable, no?



Three months, Thirty months

We are just a few days from celebrating a really big birthday, but I wanted to take a minute to update you on the other two sisters since they are currently passing milestones too.

I hit three months with Mayby2 this week.  I’m out of the first trimester and couldn’t be happier about it.  I’m anxious to feel her kicking (or at least confirm that what I’m feeling are kicks), but I’m also so relieved to be feeling nearly back to normal.  It really is true what they say about the second trimester; it is the honeymoon stage.  I’ve started on a few pieces of newborn clothing and ordered a professional snap setter (as it seems like most baby/kids clothes have snaps in them); I’m hoping this will help me in my clothes construction.

Bea turned 2.5 yesterday and she is just as two as ever.


Of my two, she is by far the more spirited, exuberant child.  I love her for this as I can appreciate many qualities she has that I lack.  As she approaches three, she is learning how to reign in her passion, when appropriate, and is otherwise easy-going and sweet.

She’s done with the paci (check), after the last remaining one broke a few weeks ago and we decided to pitch it before it became a choking hazard (mom’s thoughts).  Much to my surprise, although I shouldn’t have been given the above, it became a non-issue after the first night of sleep.  Just like her older sis, she quickly attached to her baby doll (hers is named Vella, as opposed to Stella) immediately after and does like to ensure that Vella always has her paci to sleep.

Potty training is underway (almost check), and I think she is possibly the easiest trainee on the planet. I did predict that the second one would be easier, but little did I realize how much easier when you have a highly motivated (by praise and candy) child and an older sister along for encouragement (who also gets praise and candy when little one is successful).

Big girl bed has not yet happened (no check) but we’ve soft started.  She starts out in the bed and we tell her she can stay ALL NIGHT LONG as long as she doesn’t get out of bed.  Oh is she excited to try but rarely does this last longer than a few minutes before we hear little footsteps clunking around to find us and whispers of “hi, mommy!” when she does.  As long as she keeps napping (which is starting to become iffy), I’m fine with this arrangement for now.

If I compare the two girls at this age (which I know, you’re not supposed to do), MG was much farther along in communication.  This is surprising, because MG was already a little behind her peers.  Bea has always been a little behind the curve in this but not to the point of concern.  She can say just about anything now to get her point across and is starting to form a few more complex sentences too.  Her talking is very enthusiastic (and she came with a built-in politeness meter, so it seems) that it is very endearing.  “Thank you, Mommy, thank you, Daddy, thank you, Sissy.” She will say in succession until she has landed on the right person.  She will repeat this until you acknowledge her too.

Her baby doll play has really grown in the past month and she loves changing their clothes, keeping them fed, and every time we walk out the door, it seems she must bring along her baby in a car seat, along with a diaper bag full of random…toys.

Bea’s favorite people are all the men in our family: Daddy (first of course), Papa, Gampy, and Uncle Joel.  She is a daddy’s girl through and through.

Thank you for the encouragement on my last post.  I did not mean to make it seem as though I am considering giving up my writing (although I am only one more computer issue away….just kidding, sort of).  The thoughts are just coming to me a little more slowly and I do find I enjoy the immediacy of Instagram more and more.

When I was in college I took a few painting classes to fulfill my art requirements.  I distinctly remember taking an oil painting class and sharing with my mom (who I knew would relate) that I, for the duration of that class, viewed the world in how to translate it into a painting.

In other words, I would look at a tree and think about what colors I would blend to create the perfect color and how to get the shading just right, and what texture to use for the bark.  These thoughts would come to me freely all day every day, with or without a palette in front of me.

Now it seems I go back and forth between viewing everything through the lens of a seamstress and a writer, whatever is more forefront on my brain.  I look at clothes construction in a whole new way, thinking about how to solve various problems I’m having or to create something new.

Similarly, my writer’s brain is most often turned on when I am reading a good book and have quiet time to think.  I translate my day into short snippets that I think would look appealing on a page and harmonize in the brain.  I hope as I let Sweet Mama Makes float away, I will free up more “thinking space” to do this.


Happy Birthday, Bea

Today marks the second year of life complete for our Bea.  What a great two years it has been!



Bea was born early in the morning of May 18, 2013.    I held her with a second-time mother’s confidence and also a second-time mother’s love.  Loving her and all of the wonderful things that came with her, came easily.

Bea was an easy babe from the start.  Still to this day, it is rare for her to have an “off day”, be fussy, or to not have a toothy smile pushing up her chubby cheeks no matter what the day brings..

When she walks, she bounces, curls dancing behind her.  There are two things that strangers always comment on: her smile or her curls.  bDSC_0172 2 bDSC_0178_2

The only trial she’s given us is keeping her safe.  She is curious, a risk taker, and a mouther.  Each day that has brought us closer to the two year mark has helped me breathe little sighs of relief as she learns boundaries and we are able to communicate more effectively with each other.  Still, we have a much better ER track record with this one (0 times vs. 4 times for MG), and despite being a mouthy baby, she does stay relatively healthy.

Watching the sister relationship grow and form has always held intense interest for me.  MG has played a mothering role in Bea’s life upon meeting her and it has yet to cease.  Bea only half-heartedly accepts having another “mother” in her life.  I think it is only as of late that she enjoys MG’s company and companionship.  This is one of our most earnest prayers that their relationship will strengthen and flourish.

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One thing I have noticed lately is that whenever MG is not around, Bea is a bit lost.  She looks for her, asks about it, and doesn’t seem to know how to entertain herself when she realizes she is on her own.  Sharing a room, I think, has brought them physically, as well as emotionally closer.  They both find one another’s presence reassuring.  I do not regret that decision one bit.

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Bea is a great source of joy in our family.  She keeps me lighthearted when I am feeling off.  She shows her love with kisses and full-body hugs.  She is loud and boisterous and social, in a way I find totally intriguing.  I often catch her waving at strangers and they find her perma-smile nearly irresistible.

As I look ahead to year three, I anticipate many big changes coming down the lane….losing paci, potty-training, moving to a “big girl bed”, and joining us for the church service (rather than the nursery).  Year three is a hard year….but I do think our joyful little girl will do just fine.

Dearest Bea,

I’ll never forget the morning you joined our family.  I was waiting for you with big hopes.  I had spent many days hoping for you and many more hoping for your arrival.  I hoped you would be many things: a daughter, a sister, and a friend.  

In your two years of life, you have been a delight to our hearts.  You took all of my hopes, embodied them, and then completely surpassed them.   I can’t imagine there was ever an easier baby born.  Your sister has taken great joy in you and that has brought great joy to me.  You have brought something to our family that only a last-born child can bring…a sense of wholeness. 

Your personality is one that will be envied by many.  You are nearly unaffected by your surroundings, but are happy and content no matter the circumstances.  You are engaging and kind to strangers, welcoming to your friends and family.  I never worry about leaving you with others because I know you will just be yourself the entire time I’m away.  

Your personality, and the many people that love you, will help carry you through this big year full of changes. You are eager for some of the change, I can already tell.  Having a big Sis to look up to definitely gives you some hopes to aspire to.  But you get to do them your own “Bea way”.  That is the fun part about being the youngest.

I cannot imagine our family without you, though only two years ago, that’s where we were.  In my heart, I always knew there was something missing and you came along and filled that hole right up.  

I love you so very much,

sweet mama k

also, a video

Queen Bea

Right now I’m sitting in our upstairs landing, typing this.  It’s the same chair that I used to nurse and rock her to sleep in, every night. I have to chuckle because at this stage, it’s hard to even imagine her sitting on my lap for any length of time.

In just three weeks, she will officially turn 2.

It’s hard to believe it but in 2015, our house will be free of diapers and pacis, maybe even cribs (not for good, hopefully, but for now).

The memories of newborn Bea seems hazy and a little golden.  A very sweet time in my life, full of God’s promises and feeling particularly close to Him.  And two moves later, it is getting harder and harder to remember specific memories, just feelings.

In the last two-three months, I’ve noticed some big changes in Bea.  She is starting to become a more fluid talker, adding in a few new words each day.  And MAJOR–she now calls me “Mommy” (we skipped right over “Mama”!). I don’t know why it takes my girls so long to address me (MG was closer to 20 months, Bea 22), but it never fails to feel completely wonderful and validating when it does come.

Her talking at first came on her own terms.  Now she is starting to repeat words after us, if we ask.  Also answering questions like, “how old are you?” and “what do you want to sleep with?” (“puppy”) are the new norm.

Our relationship has grown by leaps and bounds now that we can communicate.  It is so lovely to have two little beings that can retrieve items and follow simple commands.  I feel like I am heaving a big sigh of relief after the past year of being completely necessary for every waking minute.

Now that the weather has turned, we’ve been stretching our winter-atrophied muscles outside as much as much as possible.  That experience is also night and day different than last year.  She plays, rather than wandering around.  She stays near by, rather than wandering around.  And if she does take a notion to wander, she gauges me first to see if she is within bounds.  What a huge difference this makes!

One thing that hasn’t changed…she is still just as yummy as she has always been.  Her full cheeks are nearly edible, her skin is just so soft, and she really cares for physical affection in a way that MG doesn’t.

Something that still blows my mind is comparing the two girls and where they are, developmentally, right now.  MG is picking up extensive vocabulary at a rapid pace, following along in the rabbit trails of our “adult” conversation, and learning new concepts everyday.  To think she has really only been talking since she was Bea’s age–two and a half years ago–that is amazing.  Double Bea’s age and she will be there very soon too.  Oh how they grow, Mamas.  This is nothing to sneer about.



Bea is quickly catching up in size to MG.  They are now sharing some of the same clothes.  Today MG took Bea upstairs, changed her diaper, and dressed her in one of her Aurora nightgowns.  It was a little loose and saggy on her, but precious none the less.

Every meal is a battle with MG. “how much more do I have to eat?  I don’t really like that.  I just want noodles with no sauce.”  Bea multitasks with her spoon and fingers; stuffing gobs of runny food into her mouth with abandon.  And then firmly but politely asks, “more? more? more?”.

The girls are still sharing a room at night.  MG claims she can’t fall asleep without “telling stories” first.  The only person who is privy to these tales is Bea….but she usually falls asleep before the ending.  Every once in a while we will walk by and catch a snatch of monologue.  Stella is a brand new baby.   Isn’t she sweet? Princess Aurora gets sick a lot and has to sleep with a bucket.  Prince Phillip is coming to rescue us but we have to be quiet so Maleficent doesn’t hear us.  There are songs, there are villains, a lot of princesses and babies, but they always end well.

They say that children make sense of their world by processing them through story.  And I guess in many ways, that still makes me a child at heart.



Bea turned seventeen months over the weekend.


We hardly noticed this milestone but it did give me a brief moment’s pause on Sunday.  Seventeen months. More toddler than baby.  More sister than doll.

With each passing month, I am enjoying the little glimpses of human we are gaining from our Bea.  While still a few months from talking, she communicates very well….nodding “yes” or “no” to our questions (the answer to “do you want more?” is always yes), grunting her way through her desires and needs, and taking it upon herself to get where she wants to be when she wants to be (like on top of the kitchen table).

One thing I’ve come to learn about Bea is how much of an exuberant lover she is.  She doesn’t just hug us, she drapes her body weight against ours, pressing her cheek as deeply into our neck as possible, rocking her body to cover more surface area.  She doesn’t just give kisses, she gives cold, wet, open-mouth saliva kisses, so sticky you have to wipe them off. She is a lover, that Bea.


(all pics from Kimmy Howard Photography)

This month we’ve seen a small but important change in her play.  She can now sit and focus for little periods at a time.  It may cost us all of the books pulled off the shelf to sit and look at one, or all of our kitchen spoons placed in a bag to be taken out and put back in over and over, but those small periods of engagement are heavenly.

With each passing day, the girls play together a little more, communicate a little bit better, and find new ways to love each other (mostly through food).  There is a tight bond forming that we have prayed about for a long time.  I can only imagine what the future holds for these dear sisters.


Seventeen months in and we’re starting to hit a beautiful rhythm.  I no longer ache for Bea’s baby days but look forward to all that is to come with my wild, adventurous one.


A Revist and a Wait

Yesterday I visited my OB, fulfilling my health protocol of one visit per year.

Seeing as it had been a lengthy sabbatical,  the last time I saw her was at my 5-week check up following Bea’s birth.  And still a year later, that office and it’s bridge-way connection to the hospital where Bea was born is a magnet of memories.

Co-mingling are the strange feelings that overcome me when I revisit our old hometown.  The route is completely routine and strangely more familiar than my current treads.  It is a mixture of sadness, relief, joy and apprehension.  I wonder if these will eventually fade and at times I am hopeful they don’t.  It is nice, I reason, to pilgrimage when the desire strikes.

The hospital parking garage is an old, familiar friend.  I wind upwards, wondering if a lucky parking spot is awaiting me at the top.  Curiously, no matter how high you climb, the deluge of parked cars never seems to thin.  So I begin stalking the 3rd floor exit, waiting for someone to vacate.

My time spent in this wait most definitely reminds me of MG.  She faithfully accompanied me to all of my appointments, even the ones that seemed to pile on top of each other at the end of the pregnancy.  We would count the floors as we climbed the garage tower.  1….2….3…I prayed for a parking spot near the door, one that wouldn’t require me to lug my expectant belly and toddler companion through a long trek of stairs and distance.

Just like in those desperate times, an open spot suddenly appeared a very short distance from the entrance to the skyway.  Bless.

As we would walk hand-in-hand, MG would recite our routine: “first I’ll play with the baby {they have a children’s area with toys and two very ugly, but sanity-saving baby dolls}, then we will listen to the heartbeat {Bea’s}, then I’ll eat a sucker {while we wait for the doctor to finish the exam}, then I will pick out a sticker, then we will go home.”

Walking over the bridge by myself, I suddenly missed her attentive commentary.

I passed through the elevator and into the office.  Nothing has changed in my absence, at least not in the physical sense.  I wondered if MG would still think the lines on the wall looked like snakes and the window sills like benches.

I couldn’t help but notice there was another little girl in the play area with the dolls.  She had them by their plush toes and was banging their bobbly heads together.  Probably for the best MG wasn’t there.

I filled out some forms as if I were a new patient (it had been a year, afterall); carefully marking in the dates and details of my pregnancies, smiling with pride as I filled in the girls’ hefty birth weights.

Not too long after, the nurse called me back.  It had been an entire year since I had seen her but in those last days she had become a friend by sheer proximity.  I wondered if she felt towards me the gravity of emotion that I felt towards her.

The doctor came in and routinely rubbed her hands with the waterless soap hanging from a container on the wall.  The smell of it is a memory napalm to me.  I am instantly transported back to room 305, leaning over a plastic bassinet, my hospital-issued gown tented over me as it is today, my deflated belly leaning with me, just a few beats behind.

I absently press my stomach as she shakes my hand.  It is still a mystery to me that something with bones and muscle and flesh can be stretched so far and then knit itself back together.  I am proud of its accomplishments over the past four years, pushing itself to its absolute limit two separate times and then coming back down according to my pleas.  There is no little one fluttering around in there today.  It is at rest for now.

The exam is quick and she asks me about my future pregnancy plans.  It tumbles out easily.  After what we have been through together I feel I can be completely candid with her.

For the first time in five years I am not pregnant, nor do I have a baby nourishing off of me, nor do I desperately desire either of those things.  And I am pretty happy to be in that place for a while.  She gives me a knowing smile.  She has a 3 year old and a toddler of her own.  I tell people it’s because I have my hands full, as she expects, and that is part of it.  But another large part of it, that I am afraid to speak aloud, is that I am not in a hurry to usher in the end of possibly the dearest and most lucid time in my life I have ever experienced.  As long as I keep that door closed, I can relish that my days of cradling a baby are possibly not over, be that truth or not.

I leave, but somewhat reluctantly.  My heart physically hurts when I think about the last time I was here.  My happy, little toddler who had me by the hand and heart, My expectant belly full of promise fulfilled.  It was such a fleeting time in my life and surely one of the sweetest.

I don’t know when or even IF I will be back.  At some point I will most likely have to move my OB visits to my hometown.  I can’t tell if this will be a relief because I will be able to close this childbirth chapter and force my emotions to move along, or if it will come with much dread and heel-dragging, reluctant to say a final goodbye to a place rampant with memory.

My heart is a tangle of emotions.  It feels as if the good as well as the bad have encircled themselves upon it in a hard knot.  I don’t even know where to begin in order to sort them out.  For now, I think I will wait until next July, when my next appointment is due.  I am sure by then I will have a bit of clarity; when the nearness of Bea’s birth is not such a raw spot in my heart and the newness of my current home is not so strange.  Yes, I think I will give myself until then to sort it all out.



Well I think Miss Bea can officially be done with babyhood.  Her first birthday party is in the books!


I had so much fun planning this party and seeing the vision come to fruition.  It is SO much easier planning a summer party versus a fall one.  We barely spent any time indoors and even though it was a little hot/buggy, no one complained!


For food we grilled hamburgers and made fruit skewers, veggies and roasted eggplant dip (eggplants for Bea, of course :)), and chips.  We asked everyone to bring a side which greatly helped and then served cupcakes for dessert.  It was very easy and required no cooking the day of!


For activities we had water balloons, yard toys, ice blocks/chisels with toys frozen inside (plan to do a post later to explain), and our very kind neighbor hitched up his carriage and took the dads and kids for a ride!

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Even though it was a good month after Bea’s birthday, she still devoured a cupcake and played along while we sang.  I loved that it was the first day of summer and felt like it was the perfect soiree to bring in the season.


Here’s a little video of the fun:

lb 1st party from Kate  on Vimeo.


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