Month: November 2012

Second Year, Via Video

Well this wouldn’t be a birthday without a little video tribute!


Second Birthday

I have watched this video multiple times during the editing process and even shown it to MG too.  She now requests the “Meeva” video on just about a daily basis.
She also sings “Happy Birthday” and every time she gets excited or sees a picture of a cupcake or candles, she says, “Hap-Birth–TO YOU!”.
Tonight we give her a most special hand-crafted gift and I can’t wait to see the look on her face when it is finally revealed.
This second year will go down in a blaze of glory. That is to be sure.
Bring on the magic of year three!

 

It’s been real, year two

Darling MG,

It is the eve of your SECOND birthday and I am sitting outside of your door listening to you whip yourself up into your usual pre-sleep frenzy.  I love this time of day.  The satisfaction of knowing that another day is done,  predicated by my interpretation of what “you thought of the day” via your personal conversation.

(original photo via The Nest Photography)

When I look at this photo from your first birthday, I still see a lot of my baby.    But when I look at your two year pictures, I don’t see a baby anymore, I see a little girl.  A little girl with a whispy blonde bob and the most expressive blue eyes.  All this has happened within the course of a year.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

But your physical appearance is far from the only thing that has changed.  It is hard to believe that this time last year you still weren’t taking any steps and now I am chasing behind you trying to keep up. 

You have hit the vocabulary explosion that I questioned would ever come about six months ago.  Every day you add new words, some I’m even pretty sure that I didn’t teach you!  You love your nursery rhymes like Wheels on the Bus and Patty Cake and you can even recognize a few letters from the alphabet.  That I KNOW I didn’t teach you.  But I do love rediscovering all of the O’s in my life: from the stop signs to the cover of books to the scrollwork pattern on the table.  You know colors, you are learning to count, you are a fabulous puzzle constructor, and you imitate just about everything Mama does.  You are showing me the kind of Mommy and Big Sister you will be by the love and care you show for your own.  I am so thankful that God has blessed you with such a gentle soul.  It will serve you well in life.  And it is an underestimate to say that I love seeing the world through your eyes.

There is so much left to discover, my dear.  I can sense your hesitation at the edge of your discovery.  You are starting to realize what a wide and wonderful world is out there and you are gently, carefully reaching out to find it.

I urge you on, dear.  Your Daddy and I are right here behind you.  We will sacrifice our lives to protect you from harm.  And in case you haven’t already noticed, we are cheering embarrassingly loud for you; reveling in your victories and retelling your accomplishments.  We are so proud of who you are and where you are going.  

Our hearts are so full of love for you.  I do not know how it is possible to love you more than we do right now.  But each day and each discovery brings us even more love for you because it brings us more knowledge of you.  I cannot imagine how we will feel a year from now.

Grow, discover, and don’t stop holding our hands.  

We love you ever more,

Mama and Dada

(a huge thank-you to Kimmy Howard Photography for an awesome family session!)

15w, 2d

Today we got a glimpse of our Mayby!

 (view of the profile..baby is looking up towards the top of the photo)

 

This was our third ultrasound and definitely the most exciting as baby is starting to resemble a real-live human!
We saw four limbs kicking peacefully around and a little head that kept turning towards us.  They say this week that baby is now sensitive to light, so maybe that is why?
I practically begged the tech to give us a little preview of what was happening down there, but she refused to hazard a guess. 🙁  Mayby wasn’t at a good angle for me to see much either.  But I guess we will get a special Christmas Eve surprise as we go in for our gender ultrasound then.  Stay tuned!
Also, met with my new doctor today and I give her two big thumbs up.  The hospital also seems much more geared towards unmedicated birth and the staff didn’t look at me like I was crazy when I told them that is what I wanted.  As long as baby cooperates, we are good to go!
Oh, sweet Mayby, how we long to attach a face, a form, and a name to you.  We have personified you as much as we can and now the exciting wait begins.  Each month we grow  a little closer to you, both physically and emotionally.  You are making sure that I know you are there too.  I am starting to feel the tiniest kicks and jabs that are a sweet reminder of your presence.   I don’t know what the future holds for us, but the thought of adding you to our family makes it feel so much more like a family.  Suddenly Christmas traditions (among many other things) have taken on a whole new meaning.  Even though you are not yet here in person, that is a wonderful gift you have given us this year.
We will see you in 5.5 months!  Keep growing!

 

Lulu-Lemon

Today Mayby is the size of a lemon….or so they say.

And that means one thing: I am feeling remarkably better! Woohoo!!  I turned the corner just in time for my favorite holiday—Thanksgiving. The nausea still comes on strong before every meal/snack but is quickly remedied and the next thing I know I am back to feeling like myself.  Food is still a somewhat tentative relationship, so maybe no pumpkin pie or yams for me this year (too sweet), but I’ll make up for it with plenty of turkey and dressing.  And oh yes, cranberry sauce.  Just talking about cranberries is making me weak in the knees right now.
My energy is slowly recharging and I no longer need that afternoon nap every single day.  Which means I’ve been having lots of fun catching up on crafts (MG’s bday is coming up soon!), scrapbooking, and some decorating.  No, not for Christmas…yet.  I just can’t go there.  But come November 23rd, as soon as the turkey is cool to the touch, our house will be blaring NSYNC’s “The First Noel” and will reek of pine.  I can’t wait.  Plus it snowed here once, randomly, but today it is a mild 62 degrees (still warm enough to walk outside!)  So I’m still not (thankfully) in the Christmas spirit yet.
MG has been my little buddy this week as Daddy has been putting in some extra hours.  And even as we have our moments, I can tell that she has one of the sweetest, most sensitive spirits.  I am eager to nurture that trait in her as she grows.  I have also been reminded this week how blessed I am that she loves babies so much.  From being mesmerized and wanting to know the constant whereabouts of a friend’s Baby Hannah to holding newborn baby Eli’s hand while his mom changed him to spending hours changing all of her baby’s “poopy” diapers this week (her imagination, not mine :)). I am so thankful that God gave her such a mama heart.  And even though I know this change will be very hard on her in many ways, I have a feeling that she will initially welcome Mayby with open arms and very curious eyes.
Mayby has been on my mind and heart all week this week.  When sick, it was hard for me to get excited about the pregnancy like I did with MG. That was really hard on me.  But now that I am feeling better, I am starting to recapture some of that magical new mama emotion.  Like the swoony, weepy, love that I feel when I see a picture of a newborn or hear a new love song.  I can’t hardly stand the wait to find out which little baby I am carrying in there, but God has given me a sense of peace and calm towards this pregnancy that I didn’t feel last time.  And I want to feel everything.  I want to enjoy every stage. (well, from here on out, at least).  I want to relish every ounce of this pregnancy because this time there is so little unknown.  We know what that love feels like and looks like.  We know the beauty in the end result.  We know that our hearts grew about 3 times with the birth of MG and we know there is room for more.  This time we will slow down and enjoy the process.
We have so much to be thankful for, here’s to a week’s worth of Thanksgiving!

 

Nice or Creepy?

These are all things that have happened to me in past month.

Nice or Creepy You decide.

Scenario 1: I am exiting Hobby Lobby with a baby on the hip and a glass lamp in the other hand (too independent for a cart!).  A high school aged boy runs over and asks me if I need help and then procedes to open the door for me.

Decision: Nice.  How can you not love a willing teen in this day and age?  And the fact that it happened at Hobby Lobby only solidifies my love for that place.

Scenario 2: I’m at a gas station, pumping gas with MG on my hip (I had to take her inside to pay so I was giving her a lesson on pumping because we had time to kill).  A late twenties gentleman appears out of nowhere and asks if he can help.  Hold my baby?  Pump the gas?

Decision: Creep factor is high.  He looked like a genuine person, but I’m not letting anyone get their hands near my chile, that includes you, Glenda the check out lady!

Addendum:  I happened to pull out behind his truck (which had an army vet bumper sticker).  Heart softened.  While we are waiting at the red light, he suddenly gets out of his truck.  I lock my doors.  Seriously, what is going on.  He waves me around him and then I see him help push a broken-down vehicle out of the intersection.  Okay, crisis averted.  He found his good deed for day and my faith is restored in humanity.  Nice!

Scenario 3: I’m currently outside of MG’s room as I type this.  She is asleep in her crib with her favorite doll.  The one who happens to talk and giggle.  And it keeps talking and giggling at random times.

Decision: Creepy.  Time to “hide” baby and replace it with one that is a little less…ahem…noisy.

Enjoy you day…whatever nice or creepy things come your way!

A Case of the Terrible, Not so Terrible Two’s

I didn’t really know what to think of the terrible two’s.  On one hand, they terrified me.  On the other hand, I thought

over-hyped.

The so-called terrible two’s and the tantrums associated with them seemed to startin our house around 18 months and are still going strong.  Perhaps another six months or so.  Then things will magically turn right before Mayby comes.  Right?

I’m going to be honest, this stage has been hard on me.  Probably put a few gray hairs on my head……not that I’ve looked lately :).  And if someone ever asks me what my favorite age is, without the perspective of time of course, I don’t think I’ll say this one.

 

Our days are filled with extremes: extreme joy, anger, excitement, frustration, hunger, satiation, fatigue, energy, and the list goes on.

There are moments I savor that bring great joy to my heart.  More joy than ever because I begin to see her sweet personality emerge.  And there are times that I want to move quickly on from because they bring great sorrow.  Where little one and I both become frustrated with one another over things that feel so minor to her and so major to me.  Or vice versa.  This is probably where you concede that having two females in the house can sometimes lend itself to a battle of wills.

 At the end of the hard days I cling to those savory moments and remind myself that this too shall pass.  –both the good and the bad!

I guess I tend to prefer things to be just a little more predictable.

We are constantly wavering between moods and attitudes, avoiding pitfalls, foresighting shortcomings, and overlooking rookie mistakes.

And it’s a lot of hard work.

Pardon the analogy, but this stage feels a lot like obedience school.

Our little pup is pushing her boundaries and we are tightening them up.  Giving her opportunities for success and failure, lavishly cheering the victories and gently correcting the blunders.

But our hope is that we will wear ourselves out put a ton of work in now that will pay off in just a year or two.  Or whenever she decides to graduate with honors from our little training course.

“MG, come here!” means that sometimes she will come obediently but most of the time she will run in the opposite direction with a mischievous giggle.    So badly I want to laugh it off, be silly and pretend like I’m not really chasing her when I eventually flag her down.  And times do call for silliness.  But now is not one of them.  First, first she has to learn to obey.  Then we can stretch the boundaries and welcome spontaneity and learn the difference between silly and serious.

Right now is a time to learn “come here” means “come here…right now”.  Because this obedience is invaluable not only when it doesn’t matter, but also when it really does.  Like when she is near the street or in a crowded grocery store or on the edge of danger.

The hope is that the more work we put in now, the less we will have to later.

And there has definitely been some exciting progress in recent days:

Like when she spotaneously said, “THANK YOU” to Daddy this morning.
Or when I say “Can you?”  And she immdiately says “yep!” and does it.
Or when I can truthfully say, “great job” and mean it with all of my heart.

It’s a little progress each day and a little goes a long way.
Truthfully, I am so proud of her and the success she has made already.  Every once in a while I will feel or see glimpses of the future and it is so bright.  I am so thankful that God chose me to walk this path with her and her Daddy.  And if this is as bad as it gets?  Bring on the terrible, rotten, no-good threes!

 

Halloween

So in the excitement of announcing our pregnancy, I completely skipped over Halloween.

It was a great day.  MG debuted her cute little self  as a black kitty.   This year’s costume was a bit more Pottery-barn-esque as opposed to last year’s homemade version (which I tend to prefer).
 But a friend picked it up for me on clearance last year and, well, Halloween came and I had no drive to do anything else whatsoever.  I did, however, muster some energy to paint her face. Yay!
A few highlights:
-some friends came over to eat dinner and help pass out treats…it has become a yearly tradition
-for the fifth year in a row, we ran out of treats.  You would think we would be the wiser by now, but….we’re not.  2013 will be our year.  I can feel it.
-MG trick-or-treated at a few houses and loved it!  I loved it too because the only candy she cared about were dum-dums and I got the rest.  Child labor at it’s finest.
-she ate 3 dum-dums.  “Well, it IS Halloween” was my only justification
-she kept her ears on all night.  even long past trick-or-treating hours.  It was a Halloween miracle
-to my utter disappointment, there were no Gary sightings in the neighborhood. (UPDATE: Gary was reportedly spotted at his own house this year passing out full-sized candy bars.  We’ll see you in 2013, Gar!)
-at one house, a lady dressed as  witch declared to my MG, “and YOU are the cutest one of all!”
I  couldn’t agree more!
Happy (belated) Meow-lloween!

 

FAQ’s

Not that I think I’m some sort of celebrity with a FAQ section,

but the truth is, as soon as you announce your pregnancy, you tend to get asked a lot of the same questions.

Like:

1) How are you feeling? Terrible.  Can I be honest? Absolutely terrible.  I’ve been nauseated morning, noon, and night since 5.5 weeks.  I’ve had a few days of reprieve in recent weeks, most notably around weeks 9-10, but it came back with a vengeance last week.  Consider that this reprieve came after 32 days of feeling like I was on the verge of food poisoning.  I hate to complain, but seeing as how I haven’t been able to vomit out all of my sickness, I’m going to vomit out my feelings.  Even my “good days” aren’t in reality all that great.  A good day is waking up feeling normal, eat breakfast, two hours later feel nauseated.  Eat whatever carbs are on hand that haven’t already been deemed adverse in order to slay it.  Repeat every two hours.  This must be timed well with bedtime otherwise,  tossing and turning will be met with a rolling stomach.

 

But that is considered a good day because I don’t have to function with the constant nagging feeling that I am going to vomit everywhere.  Add onto this: extreme fatigue, raging hormones, and eating things that the inside of my body rarely sees.  These things mingled together have put me in somewhat of a depressive funk.  I just haven’t felt like myself in weeks.  And that has surprisingly(?)  caught me off guard. However, the light is at the end of the tunnel.  This trimester ends on Saturday and it can only get better from here, right?

 

That is my honest answer to that question, however, I hope it doesn’t diminish the fact that this pregnancy was so desired and longed-for.  I know that there are many women who would do anything to have a bout of morning sickness.  I feel you. So please don’t take this in any way as ungratefulness.  

 

2) Were you sick with your first? Yes and no.  With MG, I got sick on the exact same day, 5.5 weeksinto it.  I threw up a lot more in the beginning, but I think that’s just because I didn’t realize that eating somehow curbs the puking.  It’s a very weird thing.  I just don’t remember it lasting this long or being this intense.  Maybe that’s because I wasn’t chasing around a toddler at the time or maybe it’s because this time I was on a progesterone supplement (which they say magnifies your symptoms)  Or maybe it’s just because it is the second. Who really knows?  It’s a very strange thing.

 

3) Do you have any cravings?  Just like last time, cravings and aversions both.  Cravings come on strong and must.be.satisfied.asap.  Mostly to comfort foods: mac and cheese, biscuits and gravy, avocadoes, peanut butter, turkey sandwiches, pb&j’s,  cheese.etc.  The most surprising has been mayo.  Not like I want to eat it plain or anything (sick!), but I want it on sandwiches and find myself dreaming about things that are made from it.  Surprising because non-pregnant me sees mayo and wants to gag.   But somehow it becomes not only acceptable, but desirable come pregnancy.

Once a craving has been obtained, and deemed desirable, I must have it one other time.  And one other time only. After that, the craving has officially been satisfied and I do not want to see it ever.again.  Aversions have been to meat, vinegar-y things, sweets that aren’t sour, and anything with a strong odor.  Most unfortunately, this time of year I usually gorge myself on PSL’s, Reese’s pumpkins, and copious handfuls of mallow-creme pumpkins.  This year, I haven’t had a single bite/sip.  Not even a candy corn.  I think I’ll buy a couple of bags on clearance and save them for when I am finally in the mood.  Such a shame to be sick during this time of year.

4) Does MG know that she is going to be a big sis? Nope.  She has absolutely no concept of it.  She is a sweet and nurturing little soul to her babies, so I’m really hoping that trait pays off.    Worthy of note: recent time spent with a few newborns definitely shows some jealousy issues springing up.  Trying to figure out now how best to handle this.  Any advice?
5) Are you going to find out what you are having?  YES!  No part of me wants to wait.  I want to find out early and often.  Which always leads too…

 

6) Do you have a preference?  I’d be lying if I said I/we didn’t.  I’m sure I’ll share more on that later.

 

7) Do you have any inklings? Yes.  More on that later too.  But let’s not forget, I was wrong last time.

 

8) Do you have a name picked out?  Of course!  I’m too much of a planner to leave that one to whim.  In fact, shortly after MG was born, I felt the burning desire to name siblings for her.  Only because I wanted to make sure I would like them for a lengthy amount of time.

We are both highly attached to our girl name and have settled on a boy name too.  I also have two alternates, one boy and girl.  Have I ever mentioned how I have a peculiar fascination with baby names?  I’m sure I’ll touch on that later.  Until then, we’ve decided to call it Mayby (and if a certain pop song did NOT just make its way through your head, consider yourself a winner in the pop culture wars!  seriously, I am envious)

 

9) Are you sharing it?  Uh-uh.  Nope.  Sorry.  Just like last time, we will keep you in suspense till the bitter (and considering the way my body loves to be pregnant), I do mean bitter end.

 

10) Will you consider the epidural this time?  Consider it?  Yes.  Beg for it again?  Probably.  To say I haven’t been more than a little preoccupied with the thought of back labor and lengthy pushes again would be a lie.  Last time was different.  Last time I was blissfully naive.  This time, I have to have a solid gameplan in place or else I’m going to spend the next 6 months paralyzed in pre-labor purgatory.  Part of that gameplan has been to switch doctors to a practice that will give me up to two weeks before forcing an induction (of course pending on the baby’s and my health) and to a hospital that will allow me to have access to a birthing tub (not to give birth in which is illegal here, but to labor in).   The birthing tub is my focal point.  It is the one thing I did not get to try last time and I think it would have made a world of difference in my pain management.  At least that is what I am hyping myself up with.  Second babies come faster and easier…right?  RIGHT?  Did you hear that, Mayby?  Mama is counting on you!

 

Thanks for your interest (whether intentional or not!) friends,

Personal note: Of course now that I have shared my  exciting news, I have a whole host of new topics to discuss!  But my basic blog philosophy will remain the same…I’ll still be sharing glimpses of our life, new mama advice, cute pics of MG etc.  Plus, I really want to share the entire story of our Mayby.  I’m working on it, but I still need some time to do it justice.  So hang in here with me as I interrupt our regularly scheduled programming with some pregnancy-related stuff.  But know that I‘m still the same Sweet Mama K.  Just with a little spring in my step and bump on my belly 🙂

It’s true

I’m adding inches too my waistline, losing hair, having several emotional “crises”, feeling rather grumpy, and losing sleep.  No, I’m not turning into a middle-aged man,  
                                           I’m PREGNANT!!

In honor of gaining an extra hour of sleep this weekend, here’s to losing many more come May.

Mayby on Vimeo.

There’s a story and a half about our Mayby, but for now, I will entice you with this quote:

“Well, you know how it feels if you begin hoping for something that you want desperately badly; you almost fight against the hope because it is too good to be true; you’ve been disappointed so often before. But it was no good trying to throttle this hope. It might – really, really, it just might be true. So many odd things had happened already.” – C.S. Lewis from the magician’s nephew