Being a mom means that you are a magnet for unsolicited advice.  And we all know it starts long before you are schlepping the baby around in a car seat.  Strangers, family members, friends, everyone wants to know…If you will be going back to work or staying home?  Breastfeeding or bottle-feeding?   Preschool or Threeschool?  Bumper or no bumper?  Pacifier or thumb?   Dr. Sears or BabyWise?  Loving your child or not?  (okay that might be a little outlandish, but the questions these people ask sometimes do make you wonder!)  And then they all have an opinion, story, or justification of what they, their daughter, or their best friend did (guilty!).

Truthfully, I don’t mind this advice.  I kind of looked at it as I was a new initiate into this club and all of the members were watching out for me.  Plus, I consider myself pretty independently minded.  So the opinion of Sal at the grocery store had little affect on whether or not MG would continue sucking her thumb.  And on the other hand, I carefully weigh the stories and opinions from all those important to me and felt like I made more informed decisions because of it.

So do you want to know out of all of the unsolicited comments and questions, the implications and wisdom,  my favorite piece of advice?

It came from a family doctor that attends our church.  We met him when we studied under him in a class and I was in the last stages of pregnancy.  After MG was born, and we finally felt comfortable taking her out in public, we ran into him at church.

He stopped us, gave the appropriate compliments, and then asked us, of course, how we were doing.  At the end, he said, “You know, often new moms are made to feel guilty because they are told to ‘enjoy this time while you can!’ {at this point, he had my full attention, this was something I constantly struggled with in the early days, trying to soak in and remember every single moment and detail and feeling it slipping away too fast} and then he continued, “But this is what I like to tell moms: ‘just be sure that you are taking pictures and videos and then someday you will be able to look back and enjoy those little moments over and over and you will have them forever.’  It takes away the guilt of not being able to enjoy every moment now and it allows you to enjoy those moments indefinitely later.”

And with that I was free.

I took his advice (which was easy for me because I love taking pictures and videos anyway) and it is so true:  Those memories are so precious to me and  the best part is I will be able to enjoy them forever.

Later, I was in MOPS with his wife and she continued his advice, adding in: “By taking pictures and especially videos of your children, you are manipulating their memories.  They’ll look back at home videos and remember how fun that was!  and how golden my childhood was!  Just keep a video camera laying around in easy to access places and take videos of the everyday things and conversations.  Those are always the most fun to look back and watch.{like infamous capture of 3 year-old me holding my brand new baby sister and my parents saying, “We’ll get to keep her forever!”  and my face just falling into infinite disappointment}”

I just love that.

One day, my dear MG, we will watch all the early accounts of your life together.  The first giggles and smiles, the nude laps around the house after your bath, the sloppy dinners, the first steps, and all of moments in between.  And I won’t remind you about the tantrums and sleepless nights and battle of wills.  Those will stay my little secret until one day when it’s your turn.  But until, just know that I will be in the process of creating a beautiful childhood for you to remember.

XO,

6 Comments on Surviving Mamaland: Best Piece of Advice

  1. Amy S.
    August 10, 2012 at 2:56 am (6 years ago)

    That really is great advice! I'm pretty good about taking pics, but not as good at REMEMBERING to take video! :/ I must be better at that! Thanks for sharing!

    Reply
  2. Amy S.
    August 10, 2012 at 2:56 am (6 years ago)

    That really is great advice! I'm pretty good about taking pics, but not as good at REMEMBERING to take video! :/ I must be better at that! Thanks for sharing!

    Reply
  3. Morgan
    August 12, 2012 at 2:04 pm (6 years ago)

    Great advice. My hubby always pokes fun at me for taking so many pictures. He says that 'it's a shame our kids will never remember their childhood' haha! Their lives will be a flip book! I am pretty sure the iphone camara was invented by God to make sure we take enough pictures and videos:)

    Reply
  4. Morgan
    August 12, 2012 at 2:04 pm (6 years ago)

    Great advice. My hubby always pokes fun at me for taking so many pictures. He says that 'it's a shame our kids will never remember their childhood' haha! Their lives will be a flip book! I am pretty sure the iphone camara was invented by God to make sure we take enough pictures and videos:)

    Reply
  5. Jess Francis
    August 29, 2012 at 8:10 pm (5 years ago)

    aw I love this! Good advice. And your little girl is just too precious 🙂

    Reply
  6. Jess Francis
    August 29, 2012 at 8:10 pm (5 years ago)

    aw I love this! Good advice. And your little girl is just too precious 🙂

    Reply

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